Kay Hunter is a personal image coach and corporate trainer, specializing in complete makeovers, business and dining etiquette, and is the President of Imagine…The Possibilities in Orange County.  She has transformed hundreds of clients into more successful and confident professionals.  Kay can be contacted at (714) 665-8866, kay@kayhunter.info, www.kayhunter.info.

Silent signal . . . understanding and using body language is a very useful skill in any business or social situation.  Studies show that your actions speak much louder than your words.  Words alone may not reveal the truth or true feelings in any given conversation.  Our bodies do not know how to lie.  Studies show that Body Language accounts for 60-80% of a person’s credibility at the negotiating table. When negotiating over the phone, the person with the stronger argument usually wins.  When in person, this is not true – because we make our final decisions based on what we see and not on what we hear.

1.  Eye Contact -   Your ability to make direct eye contact is critical to your professional and personal success.  When you are meeting someone and shaking hands, eye contact should be maintained throughout the entire shake.  You should know the color of their eyes when you are finished.  At this point, your eyes should glance away for a moment.  Staring someone down without ever moving your eyes will make people uncomfortable!

2. Facial Expressions - A warm smile invites conversation and openness.  The key is the smile must be sincere, people can read a fake smile a mile away. The eyes are the secret weapon to reading or giving a sincere smile.  In a forced smile, the eyes will not react as they do with a genuine smile. When you want to show you are interested and listening, smile and nod your head up and down.  A tight lipped smile, shows you have a secret or are withholding an opinion.  Keep your hands away from your face when you speaking, because this gives the impression that you are unsure or lying! 

3.  Handshakes – The handshake is the focal point of the American greeting ritual, and it often determines the comfort level and success of an entire meeting.  Start with direct eye contact, then initiate the shake (gender is not a consideration).  This demonstrates confidence, professionalism and gracious behavior.  Meet the person’s grip web-to-web and palm-to-palm.  The shake should neither a bone crusher nor a wimp-out with the two-knuckle finger wiggle (the kind of handshake that only includes half the hand).  If you suffer from sweaty palms, blot your hand before shaking.

4.  Body Posture – Stand with your weight equally distributed on both feet.  This will eliminate the appearance of being bored or fatigued.  When you lean, you lose 95% of your presence or authority.  Proper posture communicates self-esteem – stand tall to portray confidence.  Lean forward slightly to communicate interest, a bit further forward if you want to express pressure.

5. Gestures – Use “open” gestures (i.e., hands at your sides not crossed over your chest) that will put your listeners at ease.  You will appear open, honest and ready to listen.  Avoid gestures that are distracting, such as clearing your throat, sniffling, playing with items in your pockets, or touching your hair.  These gestures communicate that you are uncomfortable, anxious or bored. Finger pointing (not necessarily pointed at someone, simply used as a gesture) creates the most negative response from listeners, and they recall less of what the speaker said.   

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5 Tips to Plan and Run a Great Meeting
by Kay Hunter

Your Professional Presence is comprised of how you look and how you act. I often address topics about how you should dress for a meeting, so this month I thought it would be beneficial to address the other side of the coin - how you act and run your meetings.  Let’s face it - meetings are the bane of the corporate world and small companies alike.   You can set yourself apart from your colleagues and competitors by running your meetings without wasting time or money!

• Purpose, Prepare, Productive, - 3 P’s. Make sure there is a purpose for the meeting.  Too many people have a meeting, just because they always have a meeting on Wednesday!  Then, the purpose must be communicated to the participants so they can come prepared.  This is best achieved by distributing a list of agenda items for the meeting ahead of time.  Agendas are most efficient when a specific amount of time is allotted for each item.  This will help in keeping the group on track. For your meeting to be productive, you must make sure the “right people” are there. No more, no less.

• Manage the Pontificators – When a meeting participant starts to pontificate, it is up to you as the meeting leader to manage the situation.  You can say something like “it looks like we’ve drifted a bit, can we comeback and focus on whatever the agenda item is?”  Another strategy is to acknowledge the person’s experience with the subject but suggest the issue be raised at a later time.

• How Long Should Your Meeting Be? – Obviously, time requirements will vary based on several factors including the complexity of issues and the urgency of the problem to be solved. If you want to maintain a level of concentration and involvement, an hour is probably best, while 1 ½ hours is the maximum without a break.

• Take Breaks – When a meeting is longer than one hour, a short break should be planned during the meeting.  For low-participation meetings, a 5 – 10 minute break should be every hour.  Breaks can be further apart for high participation meetings.